“How does one become a butterfly? You must want to fly so much… that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.”

Even though my creative mind could see that on a lovely framed poster, it landed on my heart. The actual rousing in my soul was over the simple word “want”. A very unique chapter in my life story is that at the age of 50 I realized I had been living as a caterpillar. The pressures of that time catapulted my “want” into overdrive. I desired freedom in my soul and spiritual heart so much, that I was willing to allow God to constrain me, in His grip, no matter the cost. The “check it off my list/whirlwind Phyllis” simply had no more frenetic energy to outrun His will. What felt like a season of confinement and stillness turned out to be His hand forming my life His way. I will admit I had moments of spiritual claustrophobia! I had lived a large part of my adult life stuck in the caterpillar stage by avoiding the process required to allow my spirit to fly and soar in God’s promises. To emotionally, physically, and spiritually submit to His restraint transformed me. My “want” was my catalyst.

A happy life is not the result of chance. Life is full of spiritual processes…molding, stripping, refining , forming, sanctifying, cleansing and dying to name a few. These processes are skillfully handled by our loving Shepherd….our Lord….Jesus. Our Shepherd shares His life with us! IN HIM renovation happens. The resources He offers us produces a death to old ways of thinking, acting, responding and living and replaces it with freedom and liberty! As the 23rd Psalm so lovingly describes, I have a Shepherd that supplies my “want” with MAKING me lie down in green pastures. Green pastures are those spiritual places that force our soul to find rest, supply, and nourishment. It is a restful place close to His heart! When we allow that process, He is able to fill us up with still waters…the Spirit of God!

WANT is such a small but descriptive word. We have to “want” to experience the next level in our spiritual journey! Whether it is described as the want to transform from a spiritual caterpillar to a spiritual butterfly OR the want of green pastures and still waters of rest…it is our want that is our motivator. When motivation is fueled by want, and we turn to the God of the universe with our want…we live out II Corinthians 16-18 “But whenever someone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into His glorious image.”

The same God who created the cocoon to transform a caterpillar into a butterfly is skillful enough to make you lie down in spiritual green pastures, is generous enough to lead you beside still waters, is purposed enough to change you! Through processes of want, we are changed into His glorious image!
It is a promise!

The world may try to satisfy
That longing in your soul.
You may search the wide world over
But you’ll be just as before.
You’ll never find true satisfaction
Until you’ve found the Lord,
For only Jesus can satisfy your soul.
CHORUS:
Only Jesus can satisfy your soul.
Yes, only He can change your heart
And make you whole.
He’ll give you peace you never knew,
Sweet joy and love and Heaven, too.
For only Jesus can satisfy your soul.
If you could have the fame and fortune,
All the wealth you could attain.
Yet, you have not Christ within,
Your living here would be in vain.
There’ll come a time when death will find you,
Riches cannot help you then.
So, come to Jesus, only He can satisfy.

Philippians 4:19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

Psalms 107:9 For He satisfies the longing soul, and fills the hungry soul with goodness.

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

• True riches are found IN Christ! Eternal riches far exceed external riches.
• We have soul needs that when not met morph into a black hole of desire. When not met we turn to stuff, experiences and power control to satisfy our deep longing and are left feeling empty. Only GOD can satisfy the longing in our soul. To fill the hungry soul with goodness is to be full of God on the inside which produces contentment, peace and a steadiness in life. We aren’t left groping for soul band aids.
• When we delight ourselves in the Lord, he gives us the CORRECT desires. He knows that what we REALLY desire are things the Holy Spirit can work in our heart…not a new car. He knows that what we REALLY desire is God connection….not a new house. He knows that what we really desire is communion with Him….not new furniture. He knows that His Word brings strength….a new wardrobe doesn’t. He knows that a revelation of His deep and passionate love for us brings total joy….a piece of property won’t. He knows that time spent in His presence will fortify our ability to thwart unhealthy habits… an exotic vacation won’t.

Delight yourself in the Lord and your soul cravings will be met in such a way your heart will be totally free… beating methodically with the true desire He gives!

~Phyllis~

If the apostle Paul felt it was important to get real, what is the take home lesson for us in this passage he wrote to the church in Corinth? Ignorant is a strong word that truly fits living in denial.

8 “For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we
despaired of life itself.”

Yes…committed, sold out men like Paul become burdened beyond strength. Elijah wanted to die immediately following the powerful manifestation by God on his behalf in front of the prophets of Baal. He ran into the wilderness and lay down to die. Jeremiah cried a lot and David lamented about dark times and sorrowful moments in the Psalms he composed. You can love God with all of your heart, yet pass through really tough days, weeks and years.

9 “Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death.”

Let’s get real…it can feel like that.

10 “But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. 11 You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many.”

Paul knew the power of joint prayer. Prayer is the tool God has given us to fight life with. We must pray for ourselves and one another. The apostle had great confidence in the throne of grace, yet he desired the help of others prayers. We must help each other through prayer.

In February of 2009, I despaired of ever being in full time ministry again. The grief was deep and I longed to be in full time discipleship again. I was working at Job and Family Services and I came home from work one day and felt like I didn’t even want to face life anymore. I didn’t even get my coat off…I just stood and sobbed in my living room. Out of the blue my door opened and there stood my dear friend Pat Navin. She sized up the situation, told me to sit and proceeded to lay prostrate on the floor of my living room holding my ankles and praying in the Spirit. There she was in her beautiful blue business suit and heels…holding my ankles and praying. What humility. Something broke that day. My heart wanted to go on. I have no doubt my dear friend interceded on my behalf and God responded. Two months later our Senior Pastor asked me to apply for a position on staff and I eventually was hired.

Little did I know, two years to the month later, I would sit by her bedside and intercede on her behalf as she drifted from this life to the next.

We need each other to make it home!

What a blessed life I have had.

With the cross ever before me I have been able to maintain my focus on all His provision!

I have experienced:
• Enough lack to know God’s supply
• Enough loss to know God’s comfort
• Enough failure to know God’s mercy
• Enough turmoil to know God’s peace
• Enough uncertainty to trust God’s plans
• Enough confusion to know God’s wisdom
• Enough devastation to know God’s power
• Enough betrayal to know God’s steadfastness
• Enough persecution to know God’s deliverance

He is a MIGHTY GOD!
To know and serve God is the blessed life.

Matthew 16:24 Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25For whoever would save his life, will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. 26For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? 27 For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done.”

Phyllis

Once idols are identified and crushed, the dam of idolatry in our heart is dismantled. This allows the current of God’s river of life to surge through our spirit in a way that brings passion and compassion alive! The joy and peace we step into is incomparable to ANY EARTHLY experience!

Ephesians 3:14-20
14 When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and bow to the Father, 15 the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. 16 I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. 17 Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. 18 And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 19 May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.

In turn they let down their defenses, start opening up, and even I am amazed at what God is able to do without me ever uttering His name in the official classes. I am purposed about not spelling out my occupation to them because I am convinced the light in my heart, the One I reflect, is more powerful than my title.

After I conclude the last class I say something personal about what I have enjoyed in each student. It is not uncommon for a student to tear up and say something to the affect that no one has ever said anything like that to them. Before they leave, I tell them where they can find me should they desire to talk further or ever have a need…230 N. Columbus St., Lancaster Community Church.

THEN I tell them my occupation. I cannot tell you how many times a version of, “No way…” is uttered.

That is when the real conversations start. Even though they have their certificates and are free to leave, with most sessions I have had students purposely stay to talk. Because I pepper my conversations with stories of my personal down and up journey they want to know what makes me different.

It isn’t “what”…it is “Who.”

I know they are sensing the Holy Spirit at work through my life and they see the light of Jesus love. It is my tried and true method of sharing the Gospel…reflecting Who I behold…Who my life shows worth to.

One of the ways His light shines brightest is when I make mistakes. In the earthly kingdom way of living, mistakes are not dealt with or apologized for. In His kingdom way of living, repentance is practiced and that includes when I fail other people. In our culture, a jaw can drop when someone utters the phrase, “I am wrong, please forgive me.” In a dark world, the smallest light shines so bright.

Not for our sake, GOD, no, not for our sake, but for your name’s sake, show your glory. Do it on account of your merciful love, do it on account of your faithful ways. Do it so none of the nations can say, “Where now, oh where is their God?”

Psalm 115

• The twelve year old boy teaching
• The itinerant Rabbi tapping the disciples for service
• The healer of the sick
• The defender of the outcast
• The master over the storm
• The pursued by the throngs
• The teacher by night
• The life for the dead
• The includer of children
• The harassed of the religious
• The supply for the multitudes
• The cleanser of the temple
• The agonized in the garden
• The friend betrayed
• The leader disowned

He is constant. He is always on message, never complaining, never at loss for answers, always focused, never wondering what to do, never hesitating, never apologizing, never faltering; never side -tracked, never oblivious, never compromising and never wavering in devotion to His Father.
Culture changes, hearts don’t. Culture changes, spiritual needs don’t. Culture changes, God doesn’t.
As culture swirls around us… pounding its conforming drum in our ears and minds, we slowly succumb in increments to its chipping on our souls. The incessant noise of commercial jingles, marketing ploys, trends, entertainment, lists of things we must purchase or goals we must attain, and the life attitude of the rich and famous suck on our hearts like the idol leeches they are. They drain our very souls of God’s rightful place front and center and thus rob us of contentment, peace, and communion with our Father. They scream until our spiritual heads turn and our gaze wanders from His face to their enticement. We are left spiritually anemic and stunted and wonder why we can’t reproduce disciples or walk in freedom.
Jesus was able to stay resistant to cultures magnetism and pressures by constant communion with His Father and saturation in His Father’s love. In John 17:26 he tells His Father, “I made known to them your name, and I will continue to make it known, that the love with which you have loved me may be in them, and I in them.”
If I need to remove something from a little child’s hand that could be harmful, I don’t just jerk it away. I trade them for something that would be good for them to play with…something that is safe and will teach motor skills or eye hand coordination. In place of our empty idols that give no lasting satisfaction, Jesus offers us daily bread and living water to fortify us. He has promised to give us EVERYTHING we need to resist and stand strong! 2 Peter 1:3 “By his divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life. We have received all of this by coming to know him, the one who called us to himself by means of his marvelous glory and excellence.” Press into His heart. It is a place of freedom!